You nag, he yells!

You ask, she snaps back!

You ignore, she slams the door!

It’s that time of year, when the rising senior in your home may display one or more of the following behaviors: unmotivated, cranky, short tempered, inpatient, incommunicable, indecisive.

Here are a few suggestions to help you and your teen manage her senior year together.

1. Give space (at least for a short time): The few weeks leading up to senior year can be an uncomfortable time for you and your teen. She may need to ‘nest’ a bit before gearing up to take flight and complete the entire college application process.

Your student may need a bit of time to pull back and hug her childhood teddy bears a bit more before taking on the expectations of senior year. If he is unsure of a final college list, give him more time to ‘sit’ on the decision.

Senior year and the college application process is a time for the old parenting ‘push/pull’ phenomena where the teen seems less confident and more anxious than other times of the year. This is a process. Hold on through these times of discomfort. They will pass.

2. Plan out the year:

Use your calendar for plugging in all the dates of personal and school commitments. Remind your teen that she should take time for herself during the year. Enjoy senior year traditions. Don’t fret too much as the college application process takes time.

3. Acknowledge the discomfort:

Regardless of whether your teen wants to talk about it, I recommend acknowledging how this is an uncomfortable time for her and you. Just a simple conversation about how it’s normal to feel sad, frustrated and scared will help your teen process her emotions better and normalize the negative feelings. Arguments will happen. Your teen and you will make mistakes. The process of parenting through the college application process and senior year is not supposed to be flawless. Embrace and acknowledge that once your teen leaves home, he will most likely grow to appreciate where he came from. Sometimes a teen needs to leave for that appreciation to develop.

It’s OK to doubt yourself. It’s OK to feel anxious. Process these emotions so you can move forward and take on your senior year!